Any visit to Arlington National Cemetery is inherently somber. The landscape itself demands reflection with row after row of headstones, the silent precision of the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, and the eternal flame marking President John F. Kennedy’s gravesite. On a cold and dreary winter morning, I returned to Arlington Cemetery to visit the Arlington House, the striking home on the hill.
Overlooking Washington, D.C., Arlington House is both a stately mansion and a place of reckoning. Arlington House forces visitors to confront the contradictions at the heart of American history of liberty alongside enslavement and unity alongside division. This was once a private plantation built to honor George Washington’s ideals, later occupied by Union forces, and ultimately transformed into the foundation of Arlington National Cemetery. Patriotism, privilege, enslavement, and loss intersect in this historic home.
Arlington House
Photo By Jennifer Broome
A Hilltop Approach
You cannot drive to Arlington House. From the visitor center, it’s a 12–15 minute uphill walk. The steady climb creates a natural pause before arriving at a home layered with Civil War history and ties to George Washington. They first thing you’ll likely notice is the view of Arlington Cemetery, the Potomac River and Washington, D.C.
The South Wing: Public Grandeur and Private Lives
The Arlington House self-guided tour focuses on the South Wing, beginning in the Family Parlor. This room served as the spiritual center of the home.Family members, guests, and enslaved household workers gathered daily for prayers led by the Custis-Lee women. It is also where Robert E. Lee married Mary Custis.
Across the entryway is the White Parlor. This formal parlor is where you start learning the home’s Civil War history. When Union troops crossed the Potomac River in May 1861, the Lee family fled Arlington. They took what is known as the “Washington Treasury,” including prized furniture and artifacts tied to George Washington. Union soldiers then occupied the estate, transforming the mansion into a military headquarters.
The dining room reflects the family’s social and political prominence. The table is set with china and silverware from Mount Vernon, reinforcing the Custis family’s connection to George Washington. Notable guests who dined here include Washington Irving, Andrew Jackson, and Franklin Pierce.
Mary Custis Lee and the Morning Room
The morning room offers insight into Mary Custis Lee’s authority within the household. After her father’s death, she became the sole owner of the plantation and actively managed its operations, even rebuking her husband’s attempts to control her finances. She was painting in this room in May 1861 when she learned Union troops planned to seize Arlington the following day.
Her father, George Washington Parke Custis, began building Arlington House in 1802 as both a home and a memorial to George Washington, his step-grandfather. Raised at Mount Vernon, Custis idolized the first president. He filled the Arlington House with art and symbolism meant to promote a strong federal government and an unbreakable Union.
Robert E. Lee’s Office
Lee’s office is small and restrained, a contrast to the grandeur elsewhere in the home. It includes his original desk. In 1975, President Gerald Ford sat at the desk to officially pardon Lee, an act meant to encourage reconciliation long after the Civil War ended.
Family Chambers and Daily Labor
Walking through the hallway, you pass the space where Custis’ personal servant slept in order to tend the fire throughout the night. The nearby bedroom of George Washington Parke Custis and Mary Fitzhugh Custis is where both died in the 1850s. Enslaved people on the plantation knew Custis’ will included provisions for their freedom, making his death a critical step toward emancipation.
The school and sewing room reflects the daily labor of women at Arlington House. Sewing was constant work, and the space doubled as a classroom. Mary Custis Lee and her children learned to read and write here, as did some enslaved workers, despite Virginia laws forbidding their education.
The South Slave Quarters
Behind the main house, the South Slave Quarters provide essential context sometimes absent from grand historic homes. Three small rooms document the lives of enslaved families, including Selina Gray and her husband Thornton, who raised eight children in this confined space.
Born into slavery in 1823, Selina Gray learned to read and write while working as Mary Lee’s personal maid. After the Lees fled Arlington, the Gray family expanded into the entire building until the U.S. government eventually forced them out. Their story reflects both resilience and the lasting disruption caused by displacement and loss.
Why You Should Visit Arlington House
Touring the home you see how personal lives, political beliefs, and national conflict collided on this hilltop. Visiting Arlington House deepens the meaning of Arlington Cemetery itself, reminding us remembrance requires honesty, reflection, and a willingness to engage with the full story of America’s past.
